Elly was interested in Baby Elizabeth from the beginning (Elly's full name is Elizabeth, which definitely helped). Elly's parents didn't hide Elizabeth's existence or her illness, translated into preschool language, and answered her questions as best they could. My favorite story has to do with Elizabeth's feeding tube. Elly saw a bath picture like this one day (she liked to look at Baby Elizabeth pictures):
and wanted to understand the feeding tube. Elly's mom said, "You remember I told you that Baby Elizabeth can't swallow, right? But she needs to get her mommy's milk into her tummy, so the doctors put this tube and milk goes in through that." Elly thought for a moment and then declared this a good idea by the doctors and moved on to more pictures. As in, she dealt with it better than many adults.
Here is a picture of Elizabeth reading the Valentine's Day card Elly (and family) sent:
At one point while we were in the NICU, Elly painted a picture for us that she titled "A picture of Baby Elizabeth for your room" - it is a beautiful abstract mess of a rainbow. It still hangs on our wall and makes me smile. Somehow the sweet love of little Elly for my baby girl means so much.
It amazes me how children can sometimes cope with death better than adults. I sent my niece photos of Seamus so that she would have something tangible to remember him by. One day, when my sister came to clear up after my niece who had been playing with a friend in her room, she found the photos of Seamus carefully laid out on the bed. She had been telling her friend all about her cousin who "died-ed" apparently. It was so sweet, and sad and lovely all at the same time.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad Elizabeth has someone like Elly to remember her too.
Your friend and her children sound great. Baby Elizabeth is so adorable in all the pictures.
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